Do you post things to social media just to get a reaction?
Do you make up lies because your real life is uninteresting?
Do you try and find some roundabout way to make every situation about yourself?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, you might be an attention-seeking bore. Of course, I'm probably one too. By virtue of writing a blog, I want people to read, which makes me an attention seeker to some extent. What am I writing about again? Oh yes, attention-seeking. Let's see where this one goes.
We all claim to hate attention seekers, and even though there are levels to the behavior, I think to a certain extent we all seek attention in some way. Sometimes I look at my own behavior and think if someone else were to do this, I'd probably consider them an attention seeker. And don't get me wrong; some things I do are for attention. For example, putting up polls on Instagram, being dramatic over certain situations, writing this blog post. And sometimes it is scary because I think whether this is the only reason why I do these things. Do I really care about the subject matter of this blog, or do I care more about the number of views it gets?
And I get it's easy for me to say this now, but I'd like to think the attention is rooted in a genuine attempt to show people who I am. When interacting as your virtual self, there's always going to be some level of performance. For those reading who don't know me, you might be surprised at how I really am in real life. I understand the game, the rules of the social media world, and even though I like to think of myself as charismatic, funny, and outgoing, this probably doesn't always come across in the real world. And to get people to see who I really am, I might have to lure them in with a clickbait title or slightly exaggerate part of my character.
This may seem slightly sad (it probably is), but it's not as sad as needing the attention for some form of validation. And I think that's where the true tragedy of attention comes from. Not to play psychiatrist, but attention-seeking from people, people who you don't even know, is telling of a deeper issue. However, we aren't all as free from this as we'd like to think. We all want part of the spotlight; we chase likes, follows, and shares, and the pursuit of this attention becomes more important than the message we are trying to share.
And that's why I want to stay grounded. I've been writing this blog for almost 10 years now. And still, I have a modest readership. I could go out of my way and chase the views, but one thing I have always maintained with this blog is that mostly I write it for me. If one person reads it, that's okay with me. The content will always be king, and the people who want to read it will. Of course, a wider audience would be nice, but I'm not going to turn into someone I'm not to get it.
I know I have some loyal readers who read most of my posts, and that is really all the attention I need. Everything else is just theatrics. I will never become someone who constantly checks who's seen my stories. I will never beg for likes or act outside of my character to get some sort of reaction from people. Granted, what you see online is an exaggerated version of my real self... but it's still me.
So maybe there is a "right" way to seek attention. Or maybe I'm talking out of my arse as usual and just trying to validate my own insecurities about maybe being an attention-seeking bore.